I FORGOT THE TOILET PAPER.

Okay. So I have had several people want a complete rundown of yesterday's events.
Here it is.

It started out great. The kids fed and entertained themselves and I chilled out. While I was chitting and chatting with my BFF, Ava came into the room and said,

"Would you take a picture of my new fabulous hairstyle?"

I looked at her - purple boa around her neck, fancy dress, high heels, and wet hair - and thought nothing of it. That is my girl, always up to something. So, I said,

"I will in just a minute."

Fast forward a few minutes later, Ava comes in again and says,

"I cut some more. Will you take my picture now?"
What?????

She then took the boa off and I saw her "fablious" hairstyle.

Apparently, she had decided that she wanted short hair.
This is the location of the great hair debacle.

It was actually pretty cute from the front, but where she couldn't reach was rough!

Someone referred to it as a "way fashionable mullet."

Okay. Thinking about my day and my options, I tell her to get on her cheer clinic clothes. (I know. I didn't think I would have a daughter in cheer either. I actually paid for that crap. Luckily, she said it was boring. At least the first day.) Because cheer started in an hour and I had to feed, dress, get her hair cut, and take AJ to Grandmommy's , we headed out the door.

I had no idea where to take her. I wanted cheap. She wanted the kid haircut place. Seriously, I'm going to let her have fun and get a prize for that kind of behavior. Ummmm....no.
So, we went to a hair school thinking that it would be cheap.
When there, the hairdresser (Let's call her Noah, because apparently she is good with God's creatures and she really helped save my world.) starts to spray her hair and talk to Ava about what she wanted. I'm pretty sure she could tell with Ava's own styling but whatever.
As Noah is parting and brushing Ava's hair, I see something small and brown and round on the skin over her ear. Is that???? EWWW.
Ava has a tick on her head. I wasn't sure what to do. We only had a little bit of time until cheer and I really needed her hair cut. I thought if I brought it to her attention, Noah wouldn't cut. But Noah was Noah, and she wasn't scared of a nasty little tick. She did need to go check with her teacher to make sure that she was allowed. MORTIFYING. I called Grandma, the only person I could think of able to come and help me get that sucker off of her head. She was on her way!

Noah went ahead and cut her hair. Grandma came and got it off of her. (She swears by turning counter clockwise, then pinching its head off when it is detached.) Off we went to grab lunch, drop AJ off, then cheer.

Everyone thought it was hysterical at cheer. Cute new haircut. Thanks.
For those of you that know me, I think cheerleaders are stupid and slutty. Now this is an generality, not all of them are stupid. HAHA. No, I had some friends in high school that were cheerleaders and were awesome. Some of my bias about the sluttiness comes from the fact that 2 out of 12 got pregnant my senior year. Maybe I'm exaggerating. It is just what I remember. Anyhow, my daughter is in a clinic to see if she likes it. I'm just giving her options. Apparently, it is the one good mom thing I did yesterday, because haircuts and ticks were not. Here are some pictures.

Go team. Boo.

I've been told she is the flyer.
Her tiney hiney is the one on top.

Off to the grocery store. 2 hours, sore feet, the v's (Go to the bottom to find out what these are. Warning! Not pretty) over $200 worth of groceries later, I was ready to go home. I have everything I need so that I don't have to go to the store while Todd is gone to drill for 2 weeks.

I put all of the groceries away, took an after picture, and swept the Ava hair mess.

It looks cute, I know. Don't encourage her though.
It was her bright idea to hold her hair.

As I was cleaning up, I realized that she must have cut her hair with the boa on.
I think she used it as her guide to having evenly cut hair in the front.
Doesn't it look red? Strange.

DISCLAIMER: This contains TMI, too much information!

The v's are vericose veins of the vulva. I was told when I was pregnant with Ava that it would get worse with each pregnancy. This time it is here with a vengeance. Basically, every time I walk too much, lift my legs to roll over in bed or get into the SUV, or any other leg movement, I am in agony. Pull a Barbie doll leg off. The location where the leg meets the biz is where the pain is. Fun to experience.

Okay. Back to my story. I am ready for the day to be over. Family is fed. I'm in my comfy pants and my bra has been shot across the room. I go to the bathroom, so happy to be getting ready for bed, then.... you guessed it. No toilet paper.....in the entire house. Seriously????

So today I get to go to the grocery store again. Jealous?